The search for inspiration
So school holidays are over and the kids are back to school. While part of me was a little sad to see the end of pyjama days, sleep-ins and Mario Kart Wii Championships, another part was a little excited.
But as I pulled out the school bags and organised uniforms on Sunday night, I despaired. My inspiration was gone. Just like that. Nowhere to be seen.
Did I leave it somewhere in the movie theatre, amongst all the popcorn on the floor and the seat? Maybe it went to hide in a quiet cupboard during my daughter’s 8th birthday afternoon tea. Or perhaps it disappeared among the mess on my lounge-room floor. Wherever it was, I couldn’t find it.
So I set about looking.
Hmm. Nope. Not in the kids’ school lunch boxes and not in the evening meal.
Maybe I accidentally wrapped it up in my daughter’s birthday presents. Damn. Will have to wait for the morning to find out.
No need to panic. I’m sure after a good night’s sleep, I’ll remember where it was.
I was wrong.
It wasn’t at the gym and nor was it amongst my daughter’s birthday presents. I didn’t see it at school assembly either and nor did I spy it while getting a few groceries.
It must be here somewhere!!!!
So I roamed about the house looking for my inspiration. It certainly wasn’t in the piles of birthday gifts distributed around the house. It most definitely WAS NOT in the ironing basket.
Think. Think. Where did you leave it?
Aha! Maybe it’s in the pantry. Hmm. Let’s see. There is a lot of stuff in there….
Actually, no. It’s probably not here. I mean, I’m pretty sure it’s not in the container of left-over smarties used to decorate a butterfly cake. And it’s probably not in a piece of that left-over butterfly cake either.
I sighed as I shut the pantry cupboard with empty hands.
I continued that way for most of the day. Searching, searching — looking for my inspiration.
The light faded and night fell. When it was clear that my inspiration was not going to be found in my Monday night fix of MasterChef, I decided that the search party would be disbanded until the morning.
To be honest, I forgot to look for my inspiration when I got up. Normal routine kicked in. Workout, shower, wake kids, breakfast, get organised for school and good-bye kisses at the door.
No time to look now because I’m off to the hairdresser. Perhaps I’ll look later.
And while I was sitting back having my hair shampooed and my scalp massaged, it hit me. My inspiration! It was back!
All of a sudden, I was writing again.
Not with a pen and paper, or a computer screen, but with words rolling around in my head. It was as if dozens of thoughts simultaneously collided with each other and exploded into smaller pieces, creating a myriad of new thoughts and ideas.
It was crazy.
My inspiration had never been in any one particular place. It had been hiding in many things.
The great feeling I had at the end of my workout. The beautiful view out of my kitchen window as the sun was rising. My warm bowl of oats and cappuccino for breakfast. It was there between the pages of my magazine. It was in the beautiful winter sunshine.
It was only when I stopped looking for my inspiration, and went about doing the things that I loved — the things that gave me peace and made me feel relaxed — that true inspiration came flooding back.
Welcome back little one. I’ve missed you.